January 2010
So today was the day for 3D football on TV? Wake me up when there’s 3D boy-on-boy porn, thanks.
The nosebleed techno’s begun again (by the neighbours living in an adjacent building); I don’t know whether to weep, or plan their murders.
I love the fact that guardian.co.uk has an entire section devoted to chocolate: http://bit.ly/bIOQru
Donating to http://www.wikileaks.org because the fight for global justice and for freedom of information is ongoing. If you agree, donate!
A pint of Coffee, @ScrivenerApp open on the Mac and sunshine pouring through the window: I’m ready for the work day ahead.
Fantastic programme, @aleksk. Go Dr. Aleks!
My neighbours are blasting nose-bleed techno again; I have two articles to write by Monday morning. Between now and then, someone may die.
Absolutely freakin’ hilarious: Mad TV’s NSFW iPad (amazingly, from 2006 and funnier than recent spoofs) http://bit.ly/bQacld
My favourite line: “It’s equipped with a vaginal firewall!”. Genius. http://bit.ly/bQacld
http://twitpic.com/10cx0e - Technology Unplugged show, Sky News. I think I almost defeated the frizz…
I’m guesting on Sky News’ Technology Unplugged show tonight, 7.30-8.00PM. (Will I conquer the hair frizz? Who knows?!) #fb
Today I tossed a basketball without my shoulder dislocating; it’s been 20 years since I last did this. 7 months of physiotherapy’s paid off!
Loving @oatmeal today: How To Suck At Facebook: http://bit.ly/bOzfJI
I’ve got interviews and photoshoots coming up in next two weeks: any clothing designers/brands want to loan me some outfits? [Please RT]
Opting in to the Google Books Settlement and wondering if I’ve just sold my soul to Skynet.
RT @avantgame: IMO, Wii & iPad aren’t comparable name uproars at all. Wii was silly, but iPad suggest Apple’s oblivious 2 the female mar …
After considering the evidence - no multitasking, camera, Flash, USB, SD slot, and that iBooks is US only - I will NOT be getting an iPad.
RT @SteveSparshott: Brits: Tomorrow, show your respect for Salinger; buy a tracksuit from one of his high street sport shops. Represent!
RT @jackschofield: Dear Apple http://i.imgur.com/Wo27t.jpg (pic) #ipad
RT @MitchBenn: Wouldn’t go so far as to say I’m always right but I can’t help but notice that those who disagree with me are almost inva …
Yay! Greek book promo trip now rescheduled for April; my risk of dying (from wasp sting allergy) = low. Can’t wait to meet my Greek readers!
I’m all out of sanitary towel jokes, which is surprising even to me.
I take it the iPhone will be renamed the ‘MiniPad’, yes? I can’t wait for the Extra-Length Night-Time version.
Are you an iPhone dev? Do you want to help get the best writing software ever (@ScrivenerApp) onto the iPad? Read http://bit.ly/bY7zUP RT!
Wii = you peeing; iPad = something you bleed onto and DISPOSE OF (or wash/re-use, if you’re green). If you’re female, you get the joke, OK?
(That was for all the RTs in my feed of the Wii whining, and how we’re all making a big deal out of nothing. We’re not: iPad = stupid name.)
RT @damianjennings: Steve Jobs’ announcement today makes sure he stays on the bleeding edge of technology. #ipad
RT @scottkeir: @girlonetrack the next Apple conference will have Steve Jobs welcome Clare Rayner on stage to show off the iPad’s new wings.
RT @mgrabois: @girlonetrack The large size tablet will be called the Max-iPad.
I love that #iTampon is trending (in London). It’s plug and play!
I hope the iPad will soak up the juices from all the iWanks.
Women all over the world can’t help but snigger: “But will it leak? They always leak!” #iPad.
OK, sod the Apple mania, but read this live coverage http://live.gizmodo.com/ because it’s seriously freakin’ funny.
iSquelch: the sound of lube dripping from millions of geeks’ hands as they prepare to rub them in glee.
I can’t believe that the blog post (on Gizmodo) that I last linked to has had 17K visitors in <20 mins. Geeks are so click-happy.
NB. I <3 geeks.
iGasm part one, dreams of a white bum - AKA Is This The Outer Body Of The Sanitary Pad/Tab?: http://bit.ly/9rxRZm
Steve Jobs is a genius: he’s the only successful mainstream spokesperson in favour of public wanking.
RT @damianjennings: Is two boxes of tissues enough for the Steve Note? « Only if they’re ‘man’-sized. Badum-tish.
Do you think that millions of people around the world will be having simultaneous iGasms later?
Coffee > Soho > meeting. [ Something something. ] Brain > sleep > yes please.
When I read the phrase “online blog” it makes me want to carve the words “tautology, you fucker” into the chest of the person who wrote it.
Most folk who follow me know I am a pacifist who’s just attempting wit via the use of misanthropy, @Baby_Barrister; don’t take me literally.
I’m amazed I got 92% correct in this facial recognition test: http://bit.ly/pAZid I thought I was crap at ID-ing people. /via @katebevan
Reading my accountant’s website, I misread ‘audit’ as ‘adult’, and thought, “Ooh, they specialize in sex-related material”. My brain: dirty.
.@charltonbrooker’s Newswipe is genius, just genius.
Drunk on one (double) whisky (Laphroaig 10-year-old); I am such a lightweight. (Also, I don’t drink alcohol very often.)
Just finished judging the Young Person of the Year Award for Brook Advisory Centre. It was a difficult choice to make!
Operation Tomato: Eat slightly thwarted by the fact that it bypassed my mouth entirely, and ended up in a pint of hot coffee instead.
RT @megpickard: RT @leftback: Wonder if Labour’s class-based election campaign will be as straightfwd as this Hackney effort: http://www …
